bearpaw8491
Senior Member
Will 5 gals be enough? It Apfelwein and its still bubblin'! 
Post a Meme, any Meme! (no politics)
- Thread starter ibglowin
- Start date
Help Support Winemaking Talk - Winemaking Forum:
Boatboy24
No longer a newbie, but still clueless.
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2011
- Messages
- 6,112
- Reaction score
- 10,840
How to guarantee a Darwin Award
winemanden
Senior Member
It would mean that you would have to use your brain and initiative, just like we had to do before the internet was invented. I'm sorry, but it would be harder for the youngsters than we had it. After all, it was what we did all the time!
Ohio Bob
Senior Member
When I was much younger I was part of a caving community that would frequent local and not so local caves. Our club had a man who was a professional diver, huge helmet and all, worked the piling in harbors as I recall. He lost his life diving in a cave, don’t know the details of how it happened. And this was a professional diver.
I've read that experienced and/or professionals are more likely to get killed in various activities as they get over confident, fail to take basic precautions, and/or take unnecessary risks.
Diving is a very unforgiving hobby. Any equipment failure or accident leaves you in an environment where you can’t breathe… and now you have about a minute to figure it out. That’s why we have backup equipment. If it comes to it, In open water situations you can surface. Depending on the depth You may get the bends but you’ll probably live. In any confined space you lose that option. People also don’t realize that In wrecks and caves one careless move can kick up so much sediment that you are suddenly navigating by feel. Diving is not a sport for risk takers or excitable people.
Well said.
This lesson applies to many hobbies, including sky diving, martial arts, swords, and Russian Roulette. Know the risks and pay attention to them.
Boatboy24
No longer a newbie, but still clueless.
Beware What You Ask
A wife and her husband are sitting around one evening, just talking, when the wife suddenly asks, "If I died, would you re-marry?""I would," the husband answered.
"You would?" the wife asked, a bit surprised. "Would you let her come into my house?"
"I would."
"Would she be cooking in my kitchen?"
"She would!"
"Would she be soaking in my bathtub?"
"She would!"
"Would she be putting her clothes in my closet?"
"She would!"
Growing more exasperated, the wife continued asking: "Would she be driving my car?"
"She would!"
"Would she be sleeping in my bed?"
"She would!"
"Would she be using my golf clubs?"
"Oh, no, definitely not."
"Why not?"
"She's left-handed."
Small World
Miguel and Wesley are playing golf at their favorite course, but on every hole they are being held up by a twosome of women who are always half a hole ahead.The women are great golfers, but they are playing terribly slow. Finally, after watching the women in the distance as they stood over their putts for what seemed like an eternity, Wesley decided to do something.
"I'll walk ahead and ask them if we can play through," Wesley said. He set off down the fairway, walking towards the women. But when he got halfway, he stopped, turned around and headed back to where Miguel waited.
"Can't do it," Wesley said, sounding mighty embarrassed. "One of them is my wife and the other is my mistress!"
"OK," Miguel said with understanding. "Then I'll go ask them."
Miguel started up the fairway, only to stop halfway and turn back.
"What's wrong?" Wesley asked when Miguel got back.
To which Miguel could only reply: "Small world, isn't it?"
Terrible Weather Out There
Bob was a religious golfer. Every Sunday morning, he headed to the golf course. It didn't matter what the weather was like. It could be raining and cold, but Bob didn't care. It was off to the course. Every single Sunday morning for years.But one Sunday, Bob finally met his match with the weather. He got up early and drove out to the course, hoping the weather would improve by the time he hit the first tee. But once at the course, he knew he was beat. It was just a few degrees above freezing, and the rain was coming down steady and icy cold.
For the first time in years, Bob headed back home on a Sunday morning.
His wife was still in bed when he got there, so he took off his clothes, snuggled up to his wife's backside and said "Terrible weather out there."
"Yeah," his wife replied, "and can you believe my idiot husband went golfing?"
Cardinal Nicklaus
The Pope met with his cardinals to discuss a proposal from the prime minister of Israel."Your Holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "The Israeli prime minister wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic faiths."
The Pope thought it was a good idea, but he had never held a golf club in his life. "Have we not," he asked, "a cardinal who can represent me against the leader of Israel?"
"None that plays golf very well," a cardinal repied. "But ..." he said, deep in thought, "what if we offered to make Jack Nicklaus a cardinal? We can offer to make him a cardinal, then ask him to play the Israeli prime minister as your personal representative. In addition to showing our spirit of cooperation, we'll also win the match."
Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made. Nicklaus was greatly honored and agreed to play.
The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of the result.
"I have some good news and some bad news, Your Holiness," said Nicklaus.
"Tell me the good news first, Cardinal Nicklaus," said the Pope.
"Well, Your Holiness, I don't like to brag, but even though I've played some pretty terrific rounds of golf in my life, this was the best I have ever played, by far. I must have been inspired from above. My drives were long and true, my irons were accurate and purposeful and my putting was perfect. With all due respect, my play was truly miraculous."
"There's bad news?" the Pope asked.
Nicklaus sighed. "I lost to Rabbi Woods by three strokes."
