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Feb 9, 2010
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You just never know what kind of impact you can have on a person.

My Dad has Alzheimer's and his dementia has taken a nosedive. We had to place him in a home last month because he is too far gone and Mom can not give him the level of care he needs. The problem is that he has these moments of clarity where he realizes where he is and then lays a huge guilt trip on my mom. What can I say? The whole affair has been an enormous S%^T show.

I got a call from my mom last night. Getting a call from her during the week is never good. We normally speak on the weekends and weekday calls are usually a sign that something bad has happened.

My mom said that she just visited my dad. Apparently, my dad was having one of his bad days where his dementia had taken control. "but wait to you hear this" she said..

Apparently, my dad was insisting that the alarm clock be set. "John has this big load of grapes and I want to get there early to help crush them".

I teared up.

Of all things, my dad's dementia focused on our crush! My dad has always been a tough nut. He was a staunch man that was never was one to share feelings or dole out a pat on the back or anything of the kind. His dementia was confirmation that our crushes meant a lot to him.

So, it was a case of diverse emotions. Horribly sad that Dad's dementia has taken over once again, and incredible joy in realizing that I provided him with something he enjoyed much more than I ever realized.

Sorry to post such a sappy story, but I just wanted to share this with all of you. You just never know what impact you might have on someone. My dad, like me, enjoyed the process of winemaking and not just the wine itself. Knowing this, I wish I could have just one more crush with him.
Tough to go through but good to have a sliver of positiveness in a rough situation. Thanks for sharing that story.
I hoist my glass for your father John and a second pull for your mother. We lost Cathy's dad to dementia in 2010 and my dad to prostate cancer in 2012. Both were tough to take. All that's left are the fond memories and the life lessons they shared. That and a few cubic feet of "treasures." Wishing you the best my friend.
What is really great is that it gave your father some pleasure now when he so needs it.

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