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I like to make shopping lists. I also like to leave them laying on the kitchen counter, and then guess what's on the list when I am at the store.

If you drop something when you were younger, you just picked it up. When you're older and you drop something, you stare at it for just a bit contemplating if you actually need it anymore.

One thing no one ever talks about, when it comes to being an older adult, is how much time we devote to keeping a cardboard box because it is, you know, a really good box.

It only takes one slow-walking person in the grocery store to destroy the illusion that I'm a nice person.

I just read a book about marriage that says treat your wife like you treated her on your first date. So tonight after dinner I'm dropping her off at her parent's house.
 
I asked a supermarket employee where they kept the canned peaches. He said, "I'll see," and walked away.

I asked another & he also said, "I'll see," and walked away.

I waited for one of them to come back and finally gave up. I thought, 'if you want something done, do it yourself.' So after a long search, I found them myself, in Aisle C.
 
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