Missing wine bottles

[grapeman]

Hi everybody. I have a problem at my place and would like to know how anybody else handles the matter if they ever had the problem. I, like a lot of you have a lot of wine bottles full at my home, and a couple teenage boys. MY wine racks keep getting thinned out *somehow*, especially the Concord and Raspberry. I rarely (like 2 times a year) have either of these. At first I thought I was just forgetting a few bottles I had given away, but started counting the ones on the racks. First 19 empty slots, then 20 and this morning 26. I confronted the 17 year old this morning and asked him to please stop and tried to explain how it was not a good idea to be taking it them or anything else. He admitted to taking one bottle last week to try- yeah right-just one!I also told him he wasn't fooling me about smoking. He goes outside for a walk and comes back smelling of cigarettes. The smoking bothers me, but I can't control it.


My question is this- How do all you other folks make sure the kids don't get into the wine when there are hundreds of bottles laying around on the racks? Will I need to find a room I can lock up and move it all in there? I don't want him to think he is getting away with it and don't want him totally screwing up his life!

 

[Waldo]

I would have a talk with him. Explain your concerns and let him know that you would be willing to let him sample your wines, in your presence ( If indeed you would be) Set consequences if he does not comply then enforce them with no compromise.

 

[Dean]

Tough one. I can offer advice on wine and wine making, but not on parenting, as I don't have any kids. My parents raised me with very liberal european views of alcohol. I was always allowed to have wine or beer as long as it was in their presence. They always even called other parents when I had a party, and said there would be wine and beer there, and if that was not okay with them, they should not let their kid come. They also welcomed the parents to come and partake with them in another area of the house. I think that because I was treated that way, I never felt the need to sneak liquor away.

That's not to say, as a boy, that I didn't do that with others who had stolen bottles from their parents, but I just never saw the need to have to sneak about.

The smoking is a hard one. My folks just got really mad, but eventually accepted that I was going to smoke.

 

[wildridge]

I would say something like:

Please don't sneak the wine. I'm keeping an inventory and will check it on a regular basis. If this behavior continues, there will be consequences.

 

[grapeman]

I would say something like:

Please don't sneak the wine. I'm keeping an inventory and will check it on a regular basis. If this behavior continues, there will be consequences.

That's exactly what I have done thus far. I even had him count the empty spots and he came up with 24, nice try, but there are 26 empty spots. I may need more stringent measures though and want to get input.


Waldo it is hard to tell him I will let him sample when I do. My wife would shoot me. She saw her brothers abused as children by relatives and friends that would give them beer as children and watch and laugh as they staggered around. I don't even go there.......


Dean, we have laws agaisnt those things in NY.

 

[jobe05]

It is a tough one appleman, but I can realate with a 20 year old and a 13 year old, and about 1000 bottles of wine, one wine rack is in the 20 year olds bed room.


We are fortunate, our son's haven't yet helped themselves to any. Although we thought about the "Try It" excuse, and decided to elliminate it by allowing the boys to partake in the bigining stages of making the wine. Even now, my youngest will come down to help me. If I'm racking from primary to secondary, thats what I'll let him taste........ Because it's not good! as he puts it. But if he thinks it's ot good, he may not touch the rest. Our 20 year old....... he'll be 21 in March, so we just let him partake when we have some on special occasions like special dinners etc...... Maybe 3 times a year. Since he is just getting out of a sarority in Charlotte after completeing 4 years of college, a few glasses of wine a year can not compair to the bath tubs full of budweiser that the boy has had in his recentpast.


Moral: You can't protect them from all the evils of the world, and do to so is just making them naive to a real problem. Pick your battles, evils, and teach them to be responcible with those evils, thats all you can do, the rest is up to them and what they wish for themselves and their future.


And keep in mind........


I think I grew up a fairly responcible person.................. However if my Dad had a thousand bottles of wine laying around.........??????????????? Who knows.


I once let Timmy, the youngest this past spring sign up to this board because he was reading about the dandelion wine everyone was making so he went and got some and started his own gallon of wine (with a little of my help). He wanted to post here, with pictures of his adventures and putting all together......... I had a hard time with that and got him interested in something else so he would forget the wine thing and he did. Although I must say, the dandelion wine was good....... But again, I though that if he tried a sip or so here and there, that was enough, teaching him to make it was crossing the line, having him partake in a winemaking message board was just wrong. So even though letting them have a sip now and then is feeding alcohol to a minor, I would rather take my chances with that (like I would if they took NyQuil), than have to let them make the decision between whats right and whats wrong when it comes to experimenting.

 

[Tomy]

Back when I was raising kids my good kentuckywiskey kept going down in the bottle. I ask the younger one about it and of course he told on his big brother who was 15 at the time. When the offender came home from school I went in to his room when he was watching and took his boom box to my study and locked it up. I told him a eye for a eye buddy, you steal my wiskey, I steal your things. Went back in his room and took his 22cal rifle. He was dumbfounded that I would do such a thing to him. I then told him when he wanted to talk about it come see me. That stopped the diseapearing wiskey. Edited by: Tomy

 

[Wade E]

My wine cellar has a locked door and my kids are too young so far but didnt want to leave it open to their disposal when they do and they have friends come over all the time so it was just safer to do so but I do let my daughter taste the wine i make and I definitely have to hide the Choc. Rasp. Port!

 

[PolishWineP]

I've been thinking on this one for a while. Please? You said Please? Please is certainly a word that would not be used if I were having a conversation about this with one of my kids. I would use my father's method of putting my face as close to the kid's face as I could without touching, and in a quiet yet scary voice

I would inform them that they don't even want to begin to think of what will happen to them if I find another bottle missing. I would then inform them that they would be going nowhere for the next few days and then I would return to what I wanted to be doing. No yelling. No specific threats. But that is just me.

 

[grapeman]

Thanks for all the responses. I found another twist to it yesterday while refilling them. I can't say for sure, but I had a bottle of Shiraz left on one shelf on the tall rack. I had showed the boy I was counting the short rack. Still 26 spots empty. While refilling I came across a bottle of Shiraz out of place.......hmmmmmmmm. Went to the other rack and amazing, not bottle of Shiraz on that empty shelf space. Weird. I must really be losing it.

All slots are being filled full so I will be able to easily spot empty spaces. Now if he stays out of the boxes I will be all set.


I talked to the sister that lives right next door yesterday and told her what he was doing. She told me what her one son used to do. She bakes cakes etc for weddings and so on. She uses liquers to flavor some of them. She put some in one time and tasted the frostin, not enough flavor. So she added more, still not enoug and so on. Then she tasted the bottle. Seems he was taking it out of the bottle and refilling with water

I told her the one boy was just like she used to be as a teenager and she laughed. My mom and dad weren't happy the one time we got back from Dad's folks place in South Carolina. The hardwood floor had water and wine stains on it from the big party she had while we were gone.Edited by: appleman

 

[Tomy]

When my son was about 7 years old he did something that my wife told him to go in his room and when he had thought about what he had done and was ready to get his spanking to come out and tell her.About 15 min later he came out and leaned over her knee to get his spanking. About1/2 way through it he looked back and said "How's your arm holding out Mom, my butts doing just fine"My wife started laughing, and thats the last time a spanking was given.

 

[myway22]

Great story Tomy.