A note on barrels to answer your "How long is the barrel good" question. As mentioned above, the barrel eventually loses its ability to impart oak flavor and becomes neutral. This doesn't mean it's not good for aging, just that it doesn't give off oak flavor. You still get the benefits of microoxidation and concentration from barrel aging in a neutral barrel. If oak flavor is desired, you can add cubes or staves.
I AGREE TOTALLY.
Because I use such small barrels (6-gallon), until the barrel becomes neutral and especially when the barrel is new, the time the wine can stay in the barrel is so short that very little micro-oxygenation (M.O.) or concentration has time to take place.
(The first batch of wine in a 6-gallon oak barrel will be fully oaked in 2 weeks or so. That is just not enough time for adequate M.O. or concentration, which takes several months.)
I really like it when a barrel becomes neutral, for some good reasons.
I can put the wine through a non-neutral barrel to get the oaking it needs, then move it to a neutral barrel for an extended time to get the benefits of M.O. and concentration. Or, I can just use the neutral barrel and add in my own oak chips/cubes and even layer the oak with different types of oak.
To me, because of the availability of very high quality oak chips/cube/staves, ..etc., the main benefit of the small oak barrel is in the M.O. and concentration it can provide.
Trust me when I tell you that some of the biggest disadvantages of kit wines - thin, little body, lack of M.O., can be overcome with an oak barrel. Buy an oak barrel or two, develop a good utilization barrel program, and you can produce some excellent wine from kits. If you can afford only one barrel, put each wine through it once; then as the barrel becomes neutral, put them through one more time. As a neutral, if properly cared for, a barrel can last many years.
If you make fresh/frozen grape wines, the barrel can make them turn out even better.