whino-wino
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- Feb 15, 2008
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Just for fun I've started collecting tag lines from the e-mails I get at home and work. A few of these I've taken from forums such as this. I don't know many of the origins of some of these so if someone does know please let me know. Here's a short list of what I've collected so far:
1.) Kitty Heaven is Mousie Hell
2.) "Life is tough, it's tougher if you're stupid." - John Wayne
3.) "So much to drink, so little time, only one mouth."
4.) "Whatever is hard is never easy" - Author Unknown but sounds like Yogi Berra to me
5.) "A friend will bail you out of jail. A real friend will be sitting next to you in the jail cell and say 'That was fun!'"
6.) "Friends help you move. Real Friends help you move bodies."
7.) "You're only immortal for a limited time."
8.) "The most important thing in forming relationships is sincerity. Once you learn to fake that, you've got it made."
9.) "Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice."
10.) "Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life.Laughing at someone else's can shorten it."
11.) "It is a mathematical fact that fifty percent of all doctors graduate in the bottom half of their class."
12.) "Women marry men hoping they will change, but they don't. Men marry women hoping they will not change, but they do"
13.) "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin
14.) "The quicker you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up."
15.) "I never make mistakes. I thought I did once, but I was wrong"
16.) "If you avoid failure, you also avoid success."
17.) "Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you." - John Steinbeck
18.) "If you think experts are expensive . . . wait and see what amateurs cost you."
19.) 43% of statistics are made up on the spot.
20.) "All progress requires change. But not all change is progress." --John Wooden
21.) "In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is." - Yogi Berra
22.) "You can't polish a turd, but you can roll it glitter"
23.) "Beer, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems." - Homer Simpson
24.) "NEVER start a plumbing project unless the hardware store will be open for eight more hours!!"
25.) "War does not determine who is right - only who is left."-Bertrand Russell.
26.) "Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson
27.) "Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative at the same time."
28.) "Never Underestimate the power of stupid people in large numbers."
29.) "Anyone who attempts to make something foolproof underestimates the ingenuity of fools."
1.) Kitty Heaven is Mousie Hell
2.) "Life is tough, it's tougher if you're stupid." - John Wayne
3.) "So much to drink, so little time, only one mouth."
4.) "Whatever is hard is never easy" - Author Unknown but sounds like Yogi Berra to me
5.) "A friend will bail you out of jail. A real friend will be sitting next to you in the jail cell and say 'That was fun!'"
6.) "Friends help you move. Real Friends help you move bodies."
7.) "You're only immortal for a limited time."
8.) "The most important thing in forming relationships is sincerity. Once you learn to fake that, you've got it made."
9.) "Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice."
10.) "Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life.Laughing at someone else's can shorten it."
11.) "It is a mathematical fact that fifty percent of all doctors graduate in the bottom half of their class."
12.) "Women marry men hoping they will change, but they don't. Men marry women hoping they will not change, but they do"
13.) "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin
14.) "The quicker you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up."
15.) "I never make mistakes. I thought I did once, but I was wrong"
16.) "If you avoid failure, you also avoid success."
17.) "Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you." - John Steinbeck
18.) "If you think experts are expensive . . . wait and see what amateurs cost you."
19.) 43% of statistics are made up on the spot.
20.) "All progress requires change. But not all change is progress." --John Wooden
21.) "In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is." - Yogi Berra
22.) "You can't polish a turd, but you can roll it glitter"
23.) "Beer, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems." - Homer Simpson
24.) "NEVER start a plumbing project unless the hardware store will be open for eight more hours!!"
25.) "War does not determine who is right - only who is left."-Bertrand Russell.
26.) "Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson
27.) "Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative at the same time."
28.) "Never Underestimate the power of stupid people in large numbers."
29.) "Anyone who attempts to make something foolproof underestimates the ingenuity of fools."
