I know you're not new to this but I'd never seen it before and had to ask (I hope I didn't offend).
My first reaction was, "seriously?"
But when I thought about it, you're right -- an important part of problem solving requires eliminating things, and your question is a good one. Text is a poor communication medium, and I've done the same thing, figuring out how to ask a question where the answer
should be "no", but might not be.
Wife doesn’t want me wrecking them. I think I’ve got holes in three different shirts from corker. I’m thinking Kevlar vest. Or a floor corker.
I vote for floor corker, but in the mean time, change your technique -- when using a DL corker, I put the bottle on the counter and don't have anything sensitive and/or valuable too near the corker.