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Part 1 -
A white-haired guy walked into a jeweler's shop one Friday, with a beautiful young blonde on his side.
"I'm looking for a very special ring for my girlfriend," he said.
The jeweler looks through his stock, and takes out an outstanding ring priced at $5,000.
"I don't think you understand," he tells the salesman. "I want something really unique," says the man.
At that, the excited jeweler goes and gets his special stock from the safe.
"Here's one stunning ring at $45,000," he says, dollar signs in his eyes.
The girl's eyes sparkled, and the customer said that he would take it, adding "I'll pay by check, but of course you and the bank will want to make sure that everything is in order. So I'll write the check, you can phone the bank, and then I'll fetch the ring on Monday."
Monday morning a very angry jeweler phones the man. "You bastard!!! You lied!! There's no money at all in that account!"
"I know," said the man, "I'm very sorry -- but can you imagine what a fantastic weekend I had?"
Part 2 --
Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde who knocks everyone's socks off. She hangs on Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word.
Bob's buddies at the club are all agog. They finally corner him alone and ask, "Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?"
"What do you mean, girlfriend?" Bob replies. "She's my wife!"
They're knocked over, and press on.
"How in the world did you persuade her to marry you?" they ask.
"Well," he admits, "I lied about my age."
"You cad!" one says, breaking the shocked silence.
"What, did you tell her you were only 50 or something?" asked another.
"No," Bob smiles. "I told her I was 90."
A white-haired guy walked into a jeweler's shop one Friday, with a beautiful young blonde on his side.
"I'm looking for a very special ring for my girlfriend," he said.
The jeweler looks through his stock, and takes out an outstanding ring priced at $5,000.
"I don't think you understand," he tells the salesman. "I want something really unique," says the man.
At that, the excited jeweler goes and gets his special stock from the safe.
"Here's one stunning ring at $45,000," he says, dollar signs in his eyes.
The girl's eyes sparkled, and the customer said that he would take it, adding "I'll pay by check, but of course you and the bank will want to make sure that everything is in order. So I'll write the check, you can phone the bank, and then I'll fetch the ring on Monday."
Monday morning a very angry jeweler phones the man. "You bastard!!! You lied!! There's no money at all in that account!"
"I know," said the man, "I'm very sorry -- but can you imagine what a fantastic weekend I had?"
Part 2 --
Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde who knocks everyone's socks off. She hangs on Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word.
Bob's buddies at the club are all agog. They finally corner him alone and ask, "Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?"
"What do you mean, girlfriend?" Bob replies. "She's my wife!"
They're knocked over, and press on.
"How in the world did you persuade her to marry you?" they ask.
"Well," he admits, "I lied about my age."
"You cad!" one says, breaking the shocked silence.
"What, did you tell her you were only 50 or something?" asked another.
"No," Bob smiles. "I told her I was 90."
