Jethro,
I'll try to address your questions:
(1) So it sounds like something that makes dry red wine taste better. This must be the factor that makes homemade wines taste amateurish compared to the same varietal of store-bought wine, eh?
There are so many factors that could make up the reason that you feel commercial wine taste better than home made wines, MLF is one, but aging, using quality grapes, oak barrels and years of knowledge are just as important
(2) But alcholic beverages kill bacteria, and eventually, when the concentration of alcohol becomes sufficiently intense, yeast. So that means these MLF bacteria must be introduced during primary fermentation, correct? Or are they some kind of alcohol-resistant creatures?
If your wine has an alcohol content high enough to kill MLB, you are probably making a fortified wine, or a brandy...lol You can co-ferment and add MLB to the primary during alcoholic fermentation, some say it's better, some say they like to carry out MLF independently, but it does not HAVE to be introduced in the primary
(3) Does MLF occur naturally in secondary (anerobic, carbon dioxide-rich) fermentation without adding anything at all?
The chances of it occurring in the bottle are very high and this could cause bottles to burst, make your wine sparkling, but even worse, If a spontaneous, but undesirable, strain of Malolactic bacteria becomes implanted in the winery, then all subsequent wine made in that winery, commercial or home winery, may be in danger of exhibiting the negative characteristics associated with that particular strain of bacteria. It is crucial that we add known, reliable strains of the bacteria, and not rely on the strains that have become implanted in our wineries.
(4) Anybody ever try dissolving erithyritol (a sugar alcohol typically used as an artificial sweetener) in the finished wine to see how it tastes compared to putting the same wine through MLF?
I don't have any idea about this, but it sounds like you would be masking any harsh acids instead of having them converted and making the wine smoother, or rounder.